Spouse Training: Say, “I love you (with a twist)”

This weekend my wife and I attended a Weekend to Remember event at the Hyatt Resort in beautiful Monterey, California. This is the first time we’ve attended the marriage seminar sponsored by Family Life. The event was attended by over 350 couples (over 700 people), some from as far away as Florida.

Leona and Challen on stage at the end of the Weekend to Remember marriage conference sponsored by Family Life. Photo taken by some nice folks from Fairfield, CA.

Leona and Challen on stage at the end of the Weekend to Remember marriage conference sponsored by Family Life. Photo taken by some nice folks from Fairfield, CA.


My wife and I haven’t spent this much time alone together since our first child arrived in 2004 (yes, that is 9 years), so it was a real treat to get away, for something like a date weekend. My wife was really home sick to be away from the kids the first night. During those times, I think, don’t try to fix your wife, she’s got to process that transition on her own. I missed the kids too, but, hey, I’m a guy, we guys think a bit differently.

During the weekend we had ample time for a Saturday “date night” so we slipped away to one of our favorite restaurants, Anton & Michel, in nearby Carmel (one of Jim Rohn’s favorite towns, and where Clint Eastwood used to be mayor …”Law, Order and Ice Cream”), a place we haven’t been to for … nine years… and we had a great time. My wife loves that downtown also, because there is some killer window shopping there.

This Weekend to Remember 

The speakers for our weekend were Rick and Judy Taylor and Bruce Hess. All outstanding speakers and coaches on how to improve relations between married couples and their children. They shared many of their life experiences which were stirring, poignant, and encouraging. Talk about value, this weekend just provided some great actionable value.

It is a well organized and professionally orchestrated experience, an experience which has the potential to bring real change and transformation. Couples are made aware of common negative practices that cause isolation and are provided solid solutions that will lead to oneness in your married life. All of this was packaged in an entertaining way that keeps people on their toes, as they thoughtfully interspaced manual guidance with personal stories, powerful movie clips, and voluntary audience participation.

Each speaker is a master story teller. For instance, I never met Rick Taylor before, but he’s the kind of man who comes across as wise and grounded father/grandfather. He had a couple of outdoor adventure stories that he used for object lessons that were pretty hair-raising. WIthout giving away his whole story, one had to do with going on a fishing on a 16-foot boat  along the Aleutian Island chain where the US meets Russia. He and his friends had to outrun a storm coming in and they had to make a 100 mile run battling increasing swells to make it to safe harbor. They estimated they had just enough time to reach cover at full speed and then they encountered something unexpected… that challenged their no margin for error plans. (i’m leaving you there…. sorry). Just wanted to give you a taste of cool it was to listen to these speakers.

There were special events and support for the several active duty military personnel attendees with their spouses, including a complimentary meal sponsored by Family Life.

A few pre-married couples wanting to get their long term relations on the right track were wise enough to get themselves some good heads up education at this event also.

I’m here to help… Marriages and Families

Attending this event has personal significance for me and my blog theme because I believe that in order to be successful in your profession or business, you need to make the effort strengthen your married and family life.

No matter what difficulties have occurred in the past with relationships, be assured, we have the opportunity to build upon those hard lessons and be able to make course corrections. Someday, you may be called to help others also.

Start giving your spouse a “Why”

We were all asked to plan definite actions in improving our relationships with our spouses. Volunteers announced to the gathered crowd a wide variety of personal changes they would do to help transform their marriages, and individuals were inspired to do all sorts of acts they made a commitment to do, a few examples being: I will help wash clothes on my time off, I will let her complete her thought before interjecting comments,  I will value my time more with my husband than I do with my dog…

The point is, you’ve got to start, even a small step. You’ve got to act on good ideas and changes of direction when the “intent is strong and the emotion is hot” (Jim Rohn). This is one of the keys to success.

One of my ideas that came to me was not only to tell my wife “I love you” every day the way I already do, but to also add the “why”.

And you can start adding value to your interactions with your significant other by doing that also.

Because the word “love” in the English language is so incredibly abused with a variety of applications it often runs the risk of sounding like lip service. So it will help focus the meaning if you can start supercharging your “I love you” with something you have the privilege of knowing being your spouse’s close partner. Give him or her the positive feedback, who else do you expect to do it?

Just start with “I love you because __________ “ and you fill in your own blank with something sincere and something special.

Try it, let me know how it works for you.


Share, like, comment and do it with a smile!

I’ll see you… on the next page

At the back of the Weekend to Remember conference room. Photo taken my Matt, the Family Life regional coordinator.

At the back of the Weekend to Remember conference room. Photo taken my Matt, the Family Life regional coordinator.

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